Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Once and For all,
SHUT UP ERIC [this applies to more then Eric, you know who you are, i hold grudges so DON'T expect easy forgiveness] , i have stand enough of your nonsense for the whole year, i want you out of my life, i want you away from me, i want you and your "gang" to get out of my face.
Stop trying to save yourself in my face. i cannot take anymore of whatever crap you want to say. you keep saying that everything you did was with my interest at heart. i do not see insulting as a nice form of encouragement thank you very much.
By the way, that talk we had earlier the year for reconciliation? If you had sincerely wanted a smoothed relationship between the group of us, i do not see why you DID NOT DARE TO LOOK ME IN THE EYE WHEN YOU ARE ADDRESSING ME. If that was sincerity, i have no idea what is "superficial". I have no idea why i was such a fool to actually had believe that you really wanted a "smoothed" relationship, but it ends here. Do not even expect acknowledgment from me when you "try" to be friendly anymore
you mean well? then stay away from me. Stay the fuck away from me.
FYI : if you have a problem with my friends standing up for me, i think you need to check why do they need to stand up for me in the first place
posted by Jackson @
9/30/2008 11:47:00 PM
Monday, September 29, 2008
You know what? SCREW YOU.
Yes fine, I'm in the wrong for not informing you about my appointment but that does not give you the right to bring up the goddamn past about the "st pats way of life" you know what? I am FUCKING SICK of you trying to link everything to the past. Yes, those were good memories and times, Good habits that I know we all need to comply with, But this is WAY OVERBOARD. FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE, CHANGE YOUR GODDAMN EYES AND FUCKING SEE THAT YOU ARE IN A WHOLE NEW ENVIRONMENT AND START TO ADAPT. IT HAS BEEN GOD-DAMNED NINE MONTHS. FOR THE FIRST FEW MONTHS IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE, CAUSE IT'S A WHOLE NEW PLACE. BUT NINE MONTHS? DON'T BE RIDICULOUS!
WIELD THE AXE IF YOU MUST, I DON'T CARE. SACK ME FOR ALL I GIVE A SHIT
I AM TELLING YOU STRAIGHT IN YOUR FACE. THIS BAND IS NOTHING LIKE ST PAT'S BAND AND I'M TELLING YOU TO FACE IT. PEOPLE CHANGE AND I DO NOT SEE WHY YOU WANT TO KEEP EVERYTHING THE SAME AS THE PAST. IS IT TO KEEP IT ALL "FINE AND DANDY" WELL NEWSFLASH MISTER, I'VE CHANGED AND SO HAVE THE PEOPLE AROUND! IT'S IN OUR BASIC INSTINCT TO ADAPT AND I DO NOT SEE WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ADAPTING. JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, EVEN IF I AM FROM ST PAT'S, I AM A DIFFERENT INDIVIDUAL FROM YOU. I HAVE BEEN MUCH MORE THEN YOU. I DON'T SEE YOUR PARENTS GOING THROUGH RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS. I DON'T SEE YOU HAVING TO WORK. I DON'T SEE YOU STRESS ABOUT ANYTHING OTHER THEN BAND AND STUDIES.
FURTHERMORE, LIKE I GIVE ANY SHIT ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING, BLOODY HELL. LIKE YOU SAID, I HAVE MY OWN PERSONAL LIFE AND I BLOODY HELL DON'T WANNA INVOLVE ME WITH YOURS, AS IF I AM NOT TROUBLED BY MY OWN ENOUGH.
JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, EVERYONE'S PERCEPTION OF RIGHT AND WRONG IS DIFFERENT AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE DIFFERENT SO STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME SOUND LIKE A FUCKING WILLFUL CHILD! I CAN FUCKING DECIDED FOR MYSELF. LIKE I KNOW HOW IT IS WISER TO TAKE CHRONOLOGICAL PRIORITY TOWARDS ASSIGNING IMPORTANCE IN APPOINTMENTS AND TO ADHERE TO APPOINTS. YES I APOLOGIZE FOR NOT TELLING YOU ABOUT THE APPOINTMENT BUT AT LEAST I HAVE THE FUCKING CHEEK TO AT LEAST INFORM AND ASK WHETHER IS IT ALRIGHT.
THIS IS THE FINAL STRAW. FROM HERE ON, I DO NOT KNOW ANY OF THE ST PAT'S PEOPLE THAT ARE ATTENDING SAJC NOR DO I EVER WANT TO KNOW ANY MORE THAT WOULD COME ALONG TO SAJC.
posted by Jackson @
9/29/2008 11:18:00 PM
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Hey everyone! Wow my 100th post! yay ahaha
Anyways, It's Post promos! after Tuesday [sorry cheehao i copied haha] Well, it's back to the same old enjoyment before the stressful promos.....But I'm having insecurities, sigh, cause i think i'm might retain and not be with everyone next year......
oh well, i'll leave it till it comes, on the 17th October [Like O.M.G, Right after my birthday T.T, why am i so unlucky!]
Anyways, plans were made and I'm starting work at breeks at marina square this coming Friday i think haha, hope I'll do well under new environment, even if i don't, i hope I'll get experiences! haha! Starting pay is at $5perhour! wow that's like alot!, plus might end up in catering! whee ^^, Higher pay haha!, If i survive that is...like omg haha, freaking worried at the way cheehao [his my work buddy, since he intro'ed me the place haha] described the manager....like zomg....what if it doesn't work out?
Sigh.....
I think i'm made it too obvious, I'm frightened at the prospect, as much as i yearn for it, i want us to be together but i fear what will happen to the people around us. I feel like i'm betraying people's trust, that i'm not that person to be there for you. I want to say it, but alas, I feel as if i'm not the right person to belong, that he is better for you then me. Ah, the exsaperation.......
posted by Jackson @
9/28/2008 10:44:00 AM
Saturday, September 20, 2008
wootz hey everyone haha....this is my last post before my promos haha, wish me luck! lol
Anyways, today is quite fruitful lol,
This morning met up with chee hao at bedok reservoir for morning jog, my first physical activity ever since napfa like months ago lol, Thanks to him, i managed, though barely, to complete the entire run, which was around 4.3Km in less then half-hour! yay, great improvement! From 1 hour++ because of walking to half hour! haha...
Then went for breakfast with him, followed by going home to rest abit, cause turn out my calves are really painful haha[ FYI they still hurt now lol]. Then went out to meet gabriel and Yik Ming for abit of study session, i only managed to do 1 physics paper [AJC] and also not complete haha, never do the Section C, and Section A got 3 mistakes, ZzzZ, now i'm damn scared for physics......
Oh well, gonna end here, 2 days till start of promo, 10 days till end of promos, 11 days till start of Band Practice and PW, 3 weeks till my birthday[^^], 3months 2 days till Alumni Concert[Variations IV ; VCH $12/15], 3 months 11 days till the end of 2008! Time is running fast! lol,
I Said what i meant, i'll wait for all this to be over, so i can rightfully claim you, just believe it.
posted by Jackson @
9/20/2008 10:29:00 PM
Thursday, September 11, 2008
ok time for me to just update a little,
i've been studying [yes i have been studying ^^] In hopes that i'll really do better during promos ^^
That's all i gotta say actually haha! ^^
I'll afraid of my feelings for you, I'm gonna wait for next year, Even if it's after A's before i do anything, for i fear I'll become a distraction for both of us
posted by Jackson @
9/11/2008 10:14:00 PM
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Yay haha, my internet connection changed lol.... now so much better haha....
Anyways, recently went back to school to study, while unfortunately forever late late late haha..... missed out on Hydroxyl on tuesday, [omg must copy haha], then had physics on wednesday, and today taking a small break lol....
had many many subway outing with my classmates after lessons, which i must say, i think i'm slimming down by eating more lol...... cause i notice i seem to get fatter when i watch what i eat, ZzZ oh the irony..... =.=
anyways time to rush off to be busy busy busy! lol
posted by Jackson @
9/04/2008 01:55:00 PM
